Author: Moses

Run 2932 – 13th July 2026 – Bushranger with Prairie Dog & Crayfish

Run 2932 – 13th July 2026 – Bushranger with Prairie Dog & Crayfish

You can never have too many Hashmen to set a run it would seem, and Hare Bushranger with Co-Hare Prairie Dog and Co-Co-Hare Crayfish set a wonderful Winter run from the usual spot at Dianella Soccer Club. Around 28 Hashmen turned up on a rapidly cooling clear evening, but a great night for running with no wind or rain.

Honorary On Sec/GM Pitt introduced the Hares, and Bushie set us off out of the park and into a false trail – warning us not to be fooled by Friday Hash chalk marks which were in abundance. An early count of the runners totalled 26 legs and 2 tails (9 Hashmen plus 2 dogs) as we found the trail again on the leafy residential streets of Yokine. There was plenty of      chalk “P’s”on the ground and we found another FT and saw the walkers heading towards us. After finding trail again, another headcount revealed that we were one man down, who we worked out was Red Dwarf, returning to us having just landed from a stint in Hong Kong. With no sign of him, we continued on the run, which took us in a circuit around the suburb – strangely in the shape of Africa (look at the run map!), with no main roads and using a number of dunny alleys which separated the reasonably large blocks.  Run clocked at 7.5km in 58 minutes.

Upon return to the Bucket, the walkers were already there but we still had no sign of Red Dwarf who was not answering his phone. So  with a somewhat delayed start to the circle, Pitt just got going when a lone headtorch was spotted bobbing across the adjoining paddock – thankfully Red Dwarf had returned to the fold safe and sound. Instantly he got a down down for his endeavours, claiming he just stopped to tie his shoelace, and the pack disappeared. Note: maybe we need to take more care?!

In any case Red Dwarf would have got a DD for being a returnee, along with Birdman who had just returned from bonnie Scotland where he ate Haggis and no doubt supped a wee dram or two. Sir Knob was also called out for not paying attention or something (I wasn’t paying attention).

Mastitis, resplendent in his fez and birthday crown, called out XMAS as our serial joker, he only managed 2 out of 3 jokes as he lost the third. But don’t worry, he found it and it will be presented on another night. Then straight into the run and the Hares, as time was marching on and hot food was calling. The run was noted as well set, plenty of chalk and flour, albeit modern style marking (no noughts and crosses), good area of residential streets and alleyways where it was easy to lose your bearings if you don’t know the area. Possibly another reason for Red Dwarf’s delayed return. But to cheer him up, he was invited to dive into the RA’s big hairy ball bag, and he scored the run a worthy 9.5.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Dinner was piping hot chili con carne with potato, cheese, yogurt and bread – thoroughly delicious and 2 big pots of it disappeared, with 28 grateful Hashmen.

Where else would you rather be on a Monday night???

NOTE: Next week – bring a torch and an umbrella!

 

MASTITIS

Run 2929 – by Prairie Dog GRIZZLY with Co-Hare JACK RUSSELL

– 22nd June 2026

Set in Jolimont on a fine winter evening following the Winter Solstice with a moderate turnout of about 25 hashmen.

The run with 8 runners and 1 dog, started clockwise through Mabel Talbot Park before circling through the trendy Subiaco Common development then via several underpasses including under Hay Street, and twice under the railway line through Daglish (see map in photos). Recorded at 7.7km in 1hr 11mins or 8.8km for front runners APITW and Soft Rock.

Not to be outdone by last week’s hares Grizzly preceded the circle with hors d’oeuvres of Pork Dumplings and Whiskey!

At the circle GM Pitt called up Skippy (returnee (and as of this solstice a newly joined member)); Chunder (54 year anniversary); Polly (birthday). RA Moses called up himself and Colonel (acknowledging Geelong’s defeat to the Dockers). Polly told the Joke about a student outwitting his professor to get an A. Bushie noted several irregularities in Grizzly’s run setting – who need signs? Action gave the run a mostly favourable run assessment… and the RA awarded the run a magnificent score of 9.9.

Ramrod presented the raffle boot to Phantom who drew the winning ticket, won by Elbows (not present) so the card drawn by Polly – the Queen of Hearts.

Dinner was an excellent sweet and sour pork with fried rice, after dumpling starters no doubt with the assistance of Mrs Grizzly, who surely has earned a Gordon Blue nomination!

Where else would you be on a Monday?

Run 2926- HAGGIS and ELBOWS do a virgin

FROM THE PHANTOM
It was Tuesday and numbers were down both for PH3 and WC kids.
We were a bit panicky when the bucket reported long delay on Freeway bur POLLY and XMAS were there when it counted.
The spot was definitely VIRGIN and we set off on 2 runs One for Runners (probably 12 with WC)
The other for WALKERS only set by that great VIRGIN ruiner Elbows
Both worked well until latter stages
He used lotsa walkways and even a couple of FTs for Walkers-That was Virgin.
The run was well marked once we got used to a V as arrow for Walkers but one stage Runners had an FT but at the same time ON ON for Walkers. Smart bastards as we are we sorted it out but after that BASIL did his own thing and followed trail, DICKY and PHANTOM got confused and the rest of us went home
The whole pack was back by 7:15 although in dribs and drabs.
FRANGER was there did not appear to disrupt the run with his exceptional pace. Note Ed. Huge pace disparity Emu and Moses 6.0km, Bushie a bit more, Soft Rock 7.3km, Fry 8.4 km and Phranger who knows? Lots.
PEMBO performed with Circle and a joke and HAGGIS fed the multitudes with a mild Green Chicken curry Well done all at a new site and something different for Walkers
WBDFQ FANTOME

Run 2924: FROM SOFT ROCK – NEW BENCHMARK Perth Hash House Harriers

FROM SOFT ROCK – NEW BENCHMARK
Perth Hash House Harriers – Run 2924
Hares: Birdman & Phantom
College Park, Nedlands
There are some runs that quietly remind you why hashing survives decade after decade. Run 2924 was one of them.
Set by two of the club’s elder legends, Birdman and Phantom, the trail delivered a relaxed and beautifully paced evening through the riverside suburbs of Nedlands and Claremont. With 10 runners, 13 walkers, and 4 fashionably rugged-up dogs gathering at John Leckie Pavilion, the scene already had the feel of an old-school Perth Hash night — cool air, fading light, folding chairs appearing beside the bucket, and familiar faces arriving from every direction.
The trail headed first toward Freshwater Bay where the river was almost perfectly still, reflecting the city lights and evening sky like polished glass. Huge riverside trees framed the foreshore while the pack stretched gently along the pathways, stopping occasionally at checks while walkers and runners traded places and conversation.
From there the run crossed Stirling Highway via the footbridge and wound toward Claremont Lake just as dusk settled in properly. The lake section was probably the highlight of the evening. Birdlife erupted overhead as flocks fought noisily for their preferred sleeping branches, filling the darkening parkland with movement and sound. The trail then threaded neatly back through Davies Road, Claremont Station, Claremont Park and the UWA Claremont campus before returning home without ever losing the pack or creating unnecessary confusion — a sign of experienced hares who know exactly how to use familiar territory well.
Back at the circle, the atmosphere became pure Perth Hash tradition. The barbecue was firing, the mobile bar was operating efficiently, and hashers gathered beneath the floodlights swapping stories while balancing burgers and beers. The evening welcomed a special visitor — RA Mastitis’s twin brother from the UK Ted — while returnees included Red Dwarf, Grizzly, Antman and Bushie.
A major milestone recognition went to Pitt, celebrating an astonishing 56 years with the club. Few clubs anywhere can claim members with that level of loyalty and history, and the acknowledgement was warmly received by the circle.
Bushie gave a briefing on the Interhash gathering in Indonesia, while Horse entertained everyone with a story involving an elderly couple and the realities of fading memory. Meanwhile, in classic hash fashion, Haggis somehow managed to turn a casual conversation into a lecture on Karl Marx, socialism, and how Deng Xiaoping redirected China onto a capitalist path after the failures of earlier socialist policies — proving once again that almost any topic can emerge during a Monday night circle.
The famous golden ball draw from RA Mastitis’s notoriously hairy bag, assisted by Red Dwarf and the visiting twin brother, eventually awarding the run an impressive score of 9.6.
The evening finished with excellent beef and lamb burgers, plenty of laughter, and the comfortable feeling of another thoroughly enjoyable Perth Hash Monday night successfully completed.
Really, what else would you rather be doing on a Monday evening?
Along the bay at close of day,
Birdman led the pack away.
Past still waters, darkening sky,
Where noisy birds flew home on high.
Over bridge and railway track,
Phantom gently brought us back.
Burgers, beer, and stories spun,
A golden score for Monday’s run.
Pitt marked fifty-six proud years,
Met with laughter, songs and cheers.
Hashers gathered, old and new —
What better thing could Monday do?
On On!
Softrock

Run 2923 – APITW with Moses and Maggie – J C Smith Pavillion Nedlands – 11 May 2026

 BY CRAYFISH

With the 4 week absence of Prairie Dog, Soft Rock has agreed to do the photos and I will add to the run write up. The photos will be by a separate posting. It was a perfect night for the run but only a small pack of around 26 with 7 runners. Grizzly was as usual thanked for the weather but it was quickly realised that he had nothing to do with it as he is at Nash Hash. The runners headed off chasing Q into the leafy suburbs of Nedlands and Dalkeith and Phantom as usual led the walkers armed with his ever reliable map.
Pitt has returned after a 3 weeks absence – doing battle with a surgeons knife but has now fully recovered and on the mend. He named himself as a returnee then called up Sir Tom for a birthday (not present) and Pot Hole who is 77 years young and put on the obligatory carton. He thanked Pembo for filling at the circle during his absence.
Mastitis as RA called up Elbows to let him know that the watch he repaired is now finally working – Elbows wasn’t there to receive the accolades for the usual reason – and Polly delivered the weekly joke about an elderly couple confessing to their infidelities over the years. Stewie received the prestigious Wilsons Parking Award.
The hares were called up along with Q and Haggis – Haggis being the self confessed oldest runner and Q the youngest. Q provided a critique of the run – it was of 8km duration and had some strange markings and at times the false trails a bit too long but overall a great run. He recommended that a few points be deducted as the hare promised a drink stop which turned out to be a water fountain. Colonel was asked to give a summary of the walk but said he was unqualified as he was too busy talking to Chunda and did not take in the subtleties of the walk or absorb the magnificent scenery along the way – Colonel never lets you down and is always good fodder for the RA! Mention was made that with such a small pack that the runners are starting to look out for each other and waiting for the stragglers – what a good initiative.
The run was awarded a well deserved 8.6 and food followed – pulled beef with coleslaw on a bun. Our thanks to the hares for putting on an enjoyable night and to Polly and Xmas for attending to wagon duties.

Run 2920 – Action @ Woodlands Reserve

Not sure if a run write up will arrive from elsewhere, so will put this in should there be no other.
About 28 pitched up for a run with dreadful weather forecast for the early evening. There was the odd rain spit as the Hashmen were driving in and just before run start, the lean to was perfect protection from a real shower. But the weather held and the odd drop did not decimate the run.
We had the two Malaysian visitors and Birdman had a very special birthday related to an unlucky cricket score. On the day! Happy Birthday Birdman and thanks for the beers.
The run was a very good one refer Nanny and the walk too refer Grizzly. The RA either got lost or lazy and came in with the walkers, whilst the runners were in in just over the hour with APITW running out all the FTs and checks doing near 8km and the shortest version about 6.5km. The map is that recorded setting the run.
Dinner was a fine super Chilli con carne with the accompanying necessities and there was lots for seconds.
Emu told a very fine story about how Moses exported his contraband from Russia.
The run was scored at 9.6.
Thank you Polly and Xmas for bucket duties and ice cold beer.

Pitt run 2915 Pig Trap Review

Pig Trap on Pitt run 2915 – Darlington
A lovely evening for a run/walk in a great area with lots of interesting trail options.
I was part of the walking group consisting of 12 walkers & 2 dogs. Great to see Dick Tracy back out walking, he walked with us to Sandover Rd & then turned back down Pine Tce back to the beer wagon.
The running group of 13 plus 2 dogs set off in the opposite direction to the walkers & our paths did not cross again although both groups enjoyed a drink stop at Horse’s son’s place on Owen Rd.
From the comments that the runners made I was sorry not to be able to run although the walk was very good with a reasonable amount of climbing to keep Birdman & Phantom happy.
The runners were all back by 7.00pm and soon afterwards the circle was called by GM/On Sec.
It was raised by someone that the outgoing committee did not receive down downs at the AGPU in honour of their service. This was remedied & all members of the old committee were called forth.
Next up was Birdman who was celebrating 30 or 60 years of membership or maybe somewhere in-between , I was not paying full attention.
Returnees were Horse & Q. Skippy volunteered as a returnee but he is practically a permanent returnee so he missed out.
There was a joke about a sex change and pay cuts but I missed most of it.
Next up was Sir Knob who still thinks that parliamentary privilege allows him to park in a loading zone.
Haggis apparently committed the crime of missing out on a drink at the Blue dress run last week & this resulted in all the Scotsmen receiving down downs.
Xmas excelled himself with his joke about an old married couple farting in bed and keeping score. When it got to 2 all the husband was having difficulty farting ,finally shitting himself.
When asked by his wife what happens now he called half time & change sides.
RA Mastitis called upon Rimmer & Haggis to critique the walk & run . They both gave favorable accounts in under 10 words whereupon they both took balls out the hairy ballbag , resulting in a score of 75 out of 80 using a method only known to Mastitis.
The meal was a great chicken casserole/curry with bread & butter. Lots for everyone and some leftovers for Pitt to enjoy at his leisure.
Another great night, where would you rather be on a Monday
ON On
Pig Trap

PS You are lucky enough to have another Hills run next week. There will be some ‘off piste’ running/walking so remember to bring your torches !!

Run 2914 4 Seasons Joint Run set by WCH (Simple)

FROM THE GM/ONSEC

An interesting area seldom used by PH3 since the early days Parking lighting etc all adequate. There was confusion to begin with as no senior WC office bearers present and only a small group of around 8 WC runners but, needless to say, Basil B assumed control and things got underway.

The runners took off at the usual rapid pace with Phantom struggling with the map before leading the walk. An interesting older area if a little unkempt in places and what appeared to be 2 separate running packs. A drink stop for port and lemonade was welcome as it was a chilly night.  The circle included PH3 welcoming back Dick Tracy, still recovering and recommending “whatever you’ve got spend it now as you never know!” Great to see him up and about. Ramrod was 81 on the day and bought all a drink via a token each. Thank you Ramrod. In PDs absence I’m guilty of failing to take note of the WC charges etc but it was a brief circle with the run given a 10 and finished off by Hash songs.

A more than adequate supply of Subway rolls was brought along by Mumbles and was quickly followed by departing Hashers off for a very early night. I turned around after collecting the empties , mugs, plates etc for next week’s and there was only Polly Christmas and the wagon left. Home by 8.45 ,a very rare event.

 

OnOn

 

Pitt

 

RUN 2912 Stewie and Pig Trap

Set in the hills of Maida Vale – the site has been used before and lies on the boundary of Mundy Regional Park.
The run had many hills, steep and gravelly – great territory for front runner Boner to clear all the false trails, assisted by Mastitis, Nanny, Barcode, APITW, Pothole, Q, and visitor Isacc with the other runners – about 15 in total – splitting into subgroups. The run had plenty of flour and occasionally chalk and paper but was difficult at times to follow as it split into several competing marked trails.
The walkers re-visited their youth and surprised even themselves in ascending the steep paths to the top of the hill and both runners and walkers enjoyed a drink stop with a view.
The circle was led by GM Pitt followed by RA’s Mastitis & Moses – dressed in exotic Moroccan attire – Mastitis with a most impressive ball bag. What followed was a sleek affair, well received, with too many down downs to document and the joke by Moses about a Mr Brown trying to pick a fight on an airline.
Dinner was a superb Chicken Biryani with all the condiments – top notch!!
Where else would you be on a Monday?
On On
Prairie Dog
Sacre Bleu! We all pitched up at one of the toughest run sites not too far from CBD at 4.85km in about 65 minutes. There was a full invasion of the larger Price dynasty with Bar Code flying in from Dubai and Boner running in from somewhere else training for an ultra-marathon. Even Seagull made a third appearance in short time to complement the family support.
See Prairie Dog’s official write-up with some very fine photos.
DISSENTION IN THE CAMP: YEAR OF THE HORSE. It started badly for our horse when Horse was dressed down by our fearless GM. However. However! The misdemeanour was worthy of note. Last Monday of the month Horse arrived uteless and Pitt to the rescue. There will be some harsh words in future drives together until the bandaids come off.

Run 2911- AGPU – 16th Feb 2026

The Perth Hash House Harriers Annual General Piss Up – a once-a-year extravaganza where the outgoing committee is celebrated, the incoming committee announced, and awards given to the deserving, the legendary and the notorious.
The run was set at McGillivray Oval in Floreat amongst sprawling sporting complexes and adjacent to nearby Bold Park and Perry Lakes. Hares Nanny and Phantom set the run with flour, chalk and paper through carparks, bushland, around sports stadiums and across ovals. Despite the top-level efforts of front runners Q, APITW, Mastitis, and, oddly, Seagull – how does a walker get to be a “front runner”? – the home trail was accidently picked up and the run recorded as 2.72km in 26 minutes.
The circle was preceded with hors d’oeuvres of cheese, salami, pickles, crackers, and prawns as well as a wide choice of beers courtesy of the many recent birthday donations.
At the circle, outgoing On Sec Rimmer called up the hares Phantom and Nanny; run critique was provided by Q; Returnees were Birdman, Neon, Reluctant, Q; Birthdays(?) were Neon, Q, Antman; Emu was awarded a 50 years mug; Also called up were Budgie, & Colonel (?).
Awards were Pembo; Polly; Moses; Soft Rock; Elbows; Polecat (Tripple J to deliver); Haggis; Stewie & Pig Trap.
Outgoing GM Sir Knob thanked the outgoing committee and welcomed the incoming Committee: GM Pitt; On Sec (vacant); Joint Masters Stewie and Haggis; Hash Splash and Hash Cash Polly; RA’s Mastitis, Moses and Nanny; Run Master APITW; Hash IT Bushie; Token Master Mastitis; Munch Masters Budgie & Dick Tracy; and Hash Horn Soft Rock (to be confirmed).
Dinner Mains were a choice of chicken or beef curry with rice with plenty for seconds.
Refer to The Sir Knob’s Mob 2025 HASH ANNUAL on the Perth Hash Harriers website (there is no printed copy this year) for the full write up of the year’s events along with photos, details of the Awards, the Committees reports, and more…
Where else would you be on a Monday?
On On
Prairie Dog