Run 2162 – Flasher in Leeming

Well you could say a tectonic fault affected the whole run. Was well planned, but outcome was disjointed.
Quite a few holdups as trail was hard to find.
Grey chalk is not very visible, especially when hidden under a bush!
Or perhaps the hares marked the trail last Thursday and it became somewhat faint.
Territory was good with plenty of false trails and use of laneways.
A couple of times it became a walker-led run which is pretty embarrassing for elite athletes.
Nonetheless, there were positives. Length at 55m was good, weather beautiful, lighting from the Optus stadium excellent [sorry, I meant from our new van], tucker of rolls & snags tasty and a good effort.
Scummy scored a down-down for calling on when he saw some painted arrows on the footpath [where was Pembo when you need him?]
RA Nanny scored it 9.05. Does the scoring begin at 9 nowadays?

On On Emu
[in lieu of Gumby who has vanished to the republic of Victoria]

Run 2661 – Conman in Shenton Park

Hare: Conman​​​​​​ Co Hare: Budgie
Alinea Building – Shenton Park
If they were selling real estate, this had it all. LOCATION. LOCATION. LOCATION.
Unfortunately for the hare, this is Monday night and it takes chalk, chalk and more flour. Then as an even more discouraging aspect the Hare was unable to use the alphabet, instead falling back on N American Indian iconography (I suspect we can blame Budgie for this after his many years in the snowdrifts of USA). There was significant inventiveness about the route, except for all the laneways that remained unused, lack of direction once we hit Rosalie Pk was also a source of frustration for the runners. Most of the pack failed to see any chalk after we left Rosalie Pk in a fog. Enough of the bad talk.
The location (as previously mentioned) really leant itself to a conviviality about the evening. The climate control exercised by the Hare (forget about the Co Hare here) was commendable, along with the abundance of cold VB cans, plenty of lighting and more than adequate parking to keep everyone together without leaving anyone out, to go and have to find more parking. Once the circle started, there was general agreement from Elbows that there was an influx of new songs (which probably came as a surprise to those at the back of the circle) which were agreeable to many in the circle. Perhaps these new found singing hymns can be continued???? Gumby is always willing to assist in these endeavours.
I think the pack is getting slack as they failed to serenade the Religious Advisor as he stepped forward to present his sermon, with the club song. SLACK. That apart, there was general consensus that the ramblings of the RA were mostly harmless and everyone immediately did the normal thing and made for the food cue. Here is definitely where the hare resurrected his score, as there was plenty of food and enough for thirds for those that had failed to have lunch.
So there you have it, another great night at the best Hash Club in Perth on a great evening.
Wouldn’t be dead for quids.
On On
nanny

Run 2657 – Q in Walliston

Many of our members never knew Hashers live so far away from the metro area! It was a great bush location with the lights of Kalgoorlie in the distance just over the hill.
After a short briefing by Q, PHANTOM armed with an excellent map – which even he could understand – set off in the same direction as the runners.
The run and walk took us through a variety of bushland including some large, expensive homes on very large blocks.
The pack and walkers crossed paths a couple of times. School sites were also passed along the way, with some locals asking the walkers what the hell was going on.
RUMPOLE had some sort of altercation with a motor bike rider and POLECAT scared some innocent kids in the school grounds.
A good drink (water melon stop) was set up by SEAGULL near a swamp area. How do you have a swamp hundreds of metres above sea level?
After about an hour all returned to the bucket, guided by the red light of the nearby signal tower. MOLE ran the wine tasting of our expensive purchase of SB for club fund raising.
At the ON ON HAGGIS told a joke about a massacre that happened 399 years ago. The Labor Party reinvented this massacre only last week.
DOWN DOWN to NANNY – 22 years of Hashing, MOLE – collecting raffle cash winnings, NOKI – a birthday carton, MASTITIS and HORSE – can’t remember what for.
HAGGIS also told a joke about a nun being cross – there is nothing like a hot cross nun!
SIR KNOB scored the raffle prize of a bottle of wine – no cash.
NANNY took the stage with DOWN DOWNS to NEON – for exposing himself under his coat, ELBOWS – for being community minded with a fellow Hasher, RUMPOLE and POLECAT – for the school yard altercation.
The Hares scored 9.1 for the run, even though it was set using an electric scooter. No-one got lost which is always a bonus when in the bush.
Good food and location. The weather turned cold about 8pm and everyone went home early.

ON ON BUDGIE alias DICK TRACY

PS Where was BUDGIE?

Run 2653 – Stewie in Lesmurdie

This write up was supposed to be produced by Polly. But he is too busy avoiding his hash duties so I’ll publish my Weekly Facebook Post instead.
Unofficial report on STEWIE’s run in Lesmurdie. BARCODE was co-hare.
A pack including West Coast Hash assembled in mid thirty degree heat to savour this yearly classic which invariably ends up with someone hurting themselves. I am glad to say, to my knowledge, no one took a tumble, or admitted to it, but our OnSec, HAGGIS, was seen on all four after a gravel slip at the much appreciated drink stop. Both he and The MOLE cut their losses from there and went straight back to the On On by road from there… SCB the pair of them.
The run was clocked at 6.5km, half of it uphill, the rest descending the same bloody hills! Having FRANGA and BONER up front saved the pack some distance, both running out most false trails. Great run on tracks and trails with some paved sections.
After a quick refresh, the first circle for the SHOCKJOX committee commenced with HAGGIS dispensing birthday and returns Down-downs before reading the pack a men’s health warning linking cunninlingus with throat cancer. Play now, pay later I guess. He could have saved this for next week’s circle and see how well received that would be!
And then, to the pack’s delight, it was payback time for NANNY,
as he stepped up to deliver his RA sermon the pack erupted in a raucous version of our anthem, stealing his close out opportunity as he has others, this reporter included, many times over the past couple of years. The hares were called and a run critique handed out with a score of 9.5 before we lined up for a serve of LESLIE’s shepherds pie and preparing our selves for the long drive back to civilisation.
Next week is the Harriettes’ BLUE DRESS fundraiser for MND from Wireless Hill. Bring your dosh and your no-doze. On oN. FT