Run 2184 Write-up

Run 2184 Hazelmere

I was told to write a formal report up on the run but I have never done it before or even read one. I’m allergic to computers and the internet. I get blistery welts on my palms. So, I hope this is adequate.

The run began at an abandoned army base on Old Midland Road. I thought this was a great location because I was interested to see what had been hidden behind the locked gates for so long. We all new there would be a few snakes and surprise surprise, Killkenny was a no show.

As we gathered in the car park (plenty of it) we were entertained by Ace and Rusty’s parking. We were also greeted by millions of friendly flies. This was caused by the smell from Cans’s bare feet. While running 3 successful accounting firms, God forgot to account for his running shoes and had to borrow Cans’s, leaving him barefoot.

We set off along a small bitumen road and quickly entered the bush following flour. Open checks had us spreading out across the open bushland looking for the trail. We found it and followed it underneath a fence and into thicker scrub.

Boner thought he saw a King Brown behind a bush and leapt onto it. But it was Porn Sing, a visitor from the Malaysian PG Animules Hash, relieving himself. There were many other facials after that but of a different kind, the arachnid kind.

We ran on through the webs, further into the bush following flour and paper. Many open checks spread us out across the land and kept the pack together. There were very little tracks to guide us and the hash trail kept us off them. This was clever because the tracks were generally soft sand and hard to run on and it kept the front runners guessing.

As we continued we kept a close eye out for snakes and remnants of the military exercises. The only signs were warning signs. We should have listened… Clueso was prosecuted for trespassing and Rumpole was shot at for wearing a turban.

We got lost a few times towards the end at some clever checks. The bush turned to forest and we swept through it in a line like a search party. The problem was we were walking towards home and the on on was the other way. The trail was finally found and as we all took off again, FT was almost taken out by a flying kangaroo. The pack had saw dozens at a time racing through the bush.

We ran under a fence in a large creek bed and made our way back home. It was a great run overall and many said it was a classic bush run. “There should be more bush runs like this set all Summer and street runs in Winter,” was heard around the crowd.

Rhino’s security… I mean , son joined us on the day (he was a big bloke). A stunning sunset spread over as the circle started. Ramrod told a bad joke about seamen and Lasagne got the bell for being a front runner.

Dinner was served as a lightening show began to the west. The food was delicious! There was some discussion whether it was curry or stew. After consulting with the chef, we found out it was beef bourguignonne a la hash. We all had a great night of hashing and went home to get full body tick checks from our wives or mothers.

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