2428 Nanny and AWSOME 4SOME

Awsome Foursome Joint Run – August 8, 2016

It was a dark and stormy night as runners, walkers and the undecided gathered around heaters at McGilvray Oval for this joint run. Suddenly at 6:20 PM before anyone could ask “what time does the 6:30 PM run start” an obviously cold and inpatient hare set the pack off. Fortunately for the late arrivals and those still shedding their cold weather gear a generous loop and false trail reunited the pack.

It was very definitely a run requiring torches as the trail took us through parks and bush, uphill and down dale on bitumen, limestone, grass and sand. Missing marks, long false trails, darkness, threatening rain and general confusion kept the pack roughly together.

Contrary to all regulations (apparently) we climbed into Bold Park peering into the gloom to discover the flour. Even a punishing hill followed in due course by a descent over sand failed to separate the pack as frequent failures of navigation slowed us down. Nevertheless it gradually became apparent that various runners – I’m thinking of you Birdman – had left us for a shorter and quicker route back to the gas heaters.

Leaving the park a residual group of 14 was disappointed to be directed away from home back into the suburbs. Our disappointment was relieved by the unusual sight of a drink stop where our electrolytes were recharged with what could have been port and lemonade. Once again we circled the suburb to discover the even more astonishing sight of a second drink stop. On this occasion the whiskey was no single malt nor was even the Coke genuine but it was difficult to fault the hares for two warming drink stops on a cold August night.

The four remaining runners from Perth endured songs from Hamersley and West Coast and off we set again reinvigorated by the alcohol and the sugar. More suburban streets, a hole in the fence, a large patch of wasteland and another downhill run over sand followed before we caught sight of home.

All in all this was a well set and interesting run which would have earned a high mark if it had been actually scored.

Perhaps I was too busy consuming the cheese and salami to pay sufficient attention to the circle apart from my own down down for the outrageous offence of checking emails on my phone during the run. The bits I did pay attention to were entertaining and as a whole the event did not appear to irritate Perth hash in the same way as joint circles might have in the past.

Circle survived and over we hoed into a large meal of chicken, chips and coleslaw with a very welcome whiskey aperitif. Thanks to Crayfish for a great effort on the food and drink.

Sir Knob

2427 SKID MARKS his Territory

SKID MARKS his territory with Rusty

 

It was cold as a Nun’s Nasty as we arrived at Manning . Skid sent us on our way at 6 with a traditional loop until the Walkers could not resist the opportunity to go KILKENNY Way .A number of well used FT’s and nasty tricks  kept the pack together and behing the trusty Walkers until we all reached Aquinis playing fields . Here the Walkers ,via map ,took the short cut home and left the hardy runners to more FT’s and steep hills .Walkers were back at 7 with runners , now a little spread out , in around 7 :15  .Much thought and preparation gave a top run .

Back at the Bucket downs for Grandfather LASAGNA and re-award of bell to ANTMAN

It was CANS 70 th birthday and he emptied his vaste cellar of old reds ,some whites and a range of English beers –Hash is becoming sophisticated

We feasted on a range of pies but unfortunately for SDID the supplier let him down by packing them earlier resulting in Coldish pies as against the HOT PIES at MCG on Sat.

God run ,good booze , reasonable food and as always

WOULD NOT BE DEAD FOR QUIDS

Phantom

2426 SEAGULL and Q in Xmas Marathon

Perth Hash House Harriers Official Run Write-Up
Author:  SKID
Run # 2426
25/07/16
SEAGULL & “Q” in Kenwick…with a “Christmas in July” Theme

Yours truly was seriously looking forward to running in this one, set by SEAGUL..and son of SEAGUL, “Q”. My back was feeling good and strong so I felt I should give running a crack again this week after several weeks cooling my heels with the “reserves” (walkers). Sadly, it was not to be….got to the run late about 6:30pm, after being cruelly delayed at work, so missed out on it all together.  SEAGULL’s run setting skills are indeed legendary, so I was very disappointment at missing out on what was potentially going to be the run of the year.

6:00pm saw the pack of about 50 lunatics dressed in various Christmas themed attire, head off into the blackness of another bitterly  cold Kenwick night. From what I’m told, there wasn’t much “road-work” for the pack but lots of really slow sections through obstacle infested parkland, drains, swamps and other manky, environmentally  hazardous terrain. Stealthy Hashmen were seen breaching several Cyclone wire fences around various establishments and dangerous ground in an effort to short-cut the run and get back to the gas heater and beers at the bucket. Others not so stealthy, engaged the full run which took the pack through a local school campus, only to become trapped within the grounds after the gates locked. Some got trapped in a swamp and then had to back out through it again because of a cruelly placed FT. How did walker MUMBLES get caught in that lot with the runners (says he was talking so much he lost walking pack!!!)

Half way through my second pale ale, I thought there must have been a serious problem out there when BIRDMAN trotted back to the bucket, first in after about 40 minutes. One or two more of the usual tail-enders arrived not long after, confirming suspicions of a far greater problem evolving out on the track. Some school grounds these days are quite secure due to the potential for “rock-spiders” (great Hash name) to take advantage of the local kids and this school certainly was…secure that is. So much so that none of the pack that entered the school grounds could find a way out. Attempts to scale the fences were deemed too dangerous due to the potential for full body impalement on the pointed steel bars. This was even more cruel  because Home was almost in sight! Eventually they extricated themselves (but I never heard how it was done) and about 20 or so runners finally arrived back at the bucket just before 7:40pm. Maybe the local fire brigade or the RAC rescue helicopter was called in?

This definitely put a dampener on what was otherwise a really good and well set run. No one really complained and most seemed to have enjoyed the outing despite the setback. I for one found it bloody hilarious! SEAGUL and “Q” had some heartwarming tawny ports ready on the table for homecomers. But the run itself was well set with plenty of FTs to keep the mob focused together, despite the hiccup at the end. Could have been run of year except for length… Tough on PHANTOM and the pensioners.

On Sec ACTION got the circle under way soon after, introducing a couple of guests/returnees, CODS, MASTITIS, HARLOT and RAMROD . I didn’t hear what the run score was at the end because Father bloody CHRISTMAS arrived and interrupted the RA when it was about to be given. A few brave Hashmen unconcerned with the likely adverse outcome, lined up to sit on Santa’s lap.

The hares dished up probably the best Hash meal since RUSTY’s 60th bash up in Bushmead a couple of years ago, when he served up the baked sheep shanks.  Christmas in July was well celebrated with stacks of hot roast turkey, potatoes, gravy and 2 veg. We had entrees of spring rolls and dessert  Christmas puddings to complete a truly superb Christmas repast!! I’d give the SEAGULL dinner  11/10 and recommend it as a definite Gordon Blue contender. Bloody good effort boys!

Parking and lighting good too. Great night all round.

On on
SKID

2425 ST PETER and caste of Thousands in Freo

 2425 – St. Peter's Freo Frolick

One way to keep warm on a cold winter's Monday evening in Perth is to stay at home, turn up your reverse cycle air-con and pull on your Uggs. The other is to join Perth's premier running club – the Perth Hash House Harriers, on an 8km run around the streets of Fremantle. Well thanks to this week's hare St Peter and his co-hares, Mumbles and Polecat,that is what a pack of around 40 would-be-athletes did.
The run was well set with plenty of chalk where it should be. Meaning that the only reason people had to leave the trail was for shortcutting! The route wound its way passed the prison and down to the Esplanade where there was a welcome drink stop to partake of a warming, select vintage (2016?) port. Back on thetrail and a few more road crossings later, we returned to the bucket in just under 45 minutes, ready for a nice chilled cup of splash.
All in all a good run – however this was probably the most dangerous run I have experienced this year, simply because of the number of times we had to cross the busy roads of Fremantle! Once, we crossed a busy road to find a False Trail only to cross back over again. Another time we crossed the road to the other side for just 100m of trail and then back again!
I didn't count the Hashers out and so there was no point counting them back in again at the end of the run but it seemed like everyone managed to remember their road safety rules as the crowd gathered for a quick circle. Down downs were handed to a few returnees, Pembo for his birthday and SCB for his slick hairstyle. Finally we rounded off the night with some tasty tucker – burgers with onions, cheese and a hot chilli sauce.
Well done St Peter and Co.
So next Monday evening how are you going to keep warm? Why not come for a run with the Perth Hash House Harriers and enjoy Christmas in July Hashing style!

On on
Seagull

2423 BUSHIE and CRAYFISH in Nollamarra

2423 BOOSHIE and CRAYFISH at Nollamarra

Another freezing evening trying to keep warm before the run start. Of we (the runners) went around the reserve, the start of a well set run. Long checks and cunning false trails The trail lead into a trap door in a fence, the younger runners got down on their knees and crawled through. The older and wiser runners ran along the fence. Getting to the end of the fence only to find the runners inside came up to a F.T. Not wanting to run back, Q started to scale the fence when he realised there was barbed wire stopping him. The wiser runners called a Hash Halt to let the trapped ones catch up. Should be more of them!!

Back at the circle, Down Downs were given to Stewie for Spewing. Birthdays and Tripple J for leading some of us the wrong way home. Food was Chilly Con Carne. Very nice with spuds. Great run, Great food. I didn’t expect anything less from the Duo. Hard act to follow, Well done.

Lasagna + Gnocchi

2422 Elbows at Shelley Football Club

I arrived at the advertised venue well before the Hash Foot was placed at the other car park! Apparently we were 'bumped' from the usual carpark and adjoining clubrooms because the Dockers had arrived.

So a quick drive to the alternate venue and all was good.

Action welcomed our visitors, two friends of Goliath, Dave and Winston from Melbourne. Elbows son Toby also joined us.

The run went around the park with a clever on back past the park before heading south west close to Leach Highway. After some clever false trails, the pack arrived at a crossing at Leach Highway before being directed on the correct route by a map holder.

Crayfish was happy to recognise the start of Preston Drive, one of Perth Hash Awesome Cycling Team’s (PHact) many Friday cycle routes.

After more clever false trails and parks we ran along the river past our start. Sir Knob pointed out a walkway which we nearly ran past. Then Bushie jogged past the young guns who were strolling across Shelley Park to the bucket.

Antman was running with Chunda and Chunda claimed to know the territory. After running about 2km without sighting any chalk or Leach Highway it became obvious Chunda didn’t really know the way. Antman used the maps on his smart phone until the battery went flat. But then they saw Haggis’s house so all was well.

8.26 km on the Bush-metre.

Sherlock, Captain and Aristo (or Polecat) were given down-downs. Polecat has misplaced the bell.

Q, 3G & SCB were given down-downs.

As Elbows indicated there would be no food his 8 points was downgraded to 7. Ahh. just a false trail, the food was a tasty soup with French bread sticks. Just the thing for a cold night with no heater.

On On  to next week’s run in the northern suburbs.

Bushie

2420 Return of LUNA

2420 Luna Returns for a Refund

 

 It was a fund raiser for Guide Dogs and Dave the Pom arranged for Luna  to make an appearance and beg for funds .Now it turns out that Luna failed to make the cut as a Guide Dog (Poor Teacher  ??) but she was apparently a party girl so she snapped up (like the phrase ) a job as Public Relations .Personally I was a little more taken by her Boss Jessica—those long legs and boots !!  Thanks for your donations all .

 

The run was in relatively unused territory set by FT  , and we would have been in the Shite if it rained   

The run had lots of False Trails and checks and allowed the Walkers to participate at various stages up to the drink stop . Who needs one on a cold night. At the drink stop Xmas dragged out his pretty daughter (looks from Mum obviously ) and Handsome grandson (same comment )

 

After this the run tended to fracture a little and the pack arrived in dribs and drabs from various directions . FT said 6 kms but Sir Knob ran 7.3 (then who believes a politician)

The timing was about 1 hr  10mins

 

At the bucket BONER was recognized for his Marathon effort and RUMPOLE  (goodbye for 6 weeks ) Castigated for his selfish act of staying in the warm pub last week and leaving his mates keyless and Splashless for 20 minutes

 

Good night but poor crowd .Are we becoming Wimps at first sight of cold and rain

Committee did Pizzas All good

 

Written on behalf of the SHAKIN Party

Spoken by Luna

2418 MOSES and JAAPIE in Jewish Territory

2418 MOSES does Dianella

You’d expect miracles from Moses, but they must be still coming.  A cold start, the precursor of a 4 degree morning. Moses must have worked this out because there was no let-up for entire run – did he set it on his 27 speed bike?

Perhaps a few more members than usual knew this as there seemed a record number of walkers.

Anyway off we went in the dark and quite soon after we were confronted by the steepest hill in the metro area other than up in Stewieville.

Right at the top was none other than Bushie’s palace with Mary Poppins out the front serving a few beers to the front runners.

However, it didn’t slow them down enough to prevent the formation of 3 packs and as Nanny correctly identified, it meant 3 guys had an ego trip thinking they were at the front – could also be interpreted as sharing!

Quite a few long stretches after that, as is often the case in older suburbs.

 

Good run time of 55 minutes, well marked and good lighting.

 

Barcode have us an abridged account of interhash in Bali.

 

Hot spud and corned beef appreciated. Good effort Moses and Jaapie. Not sure about Neon’s 8.5?

 

On On Emu

2414 SIR TOMARSE at Perry Lakes

Apolgies for late submission…..

Arrived with aching tooth after being attended by the ivory rustler (Dentist) so did not join the run.  The run started on time at 6pm. Pack of walkers set of in what I assume was the right direction towards Bold Park.  Here the runners misplaced the trail and then short cut the trail.

 The runners arrived back between 6:35 to 6:40. Many comments were made about how good the run was although misplacing the trail.

The walkers arrived back a little while after with two members sustaining injuries. Apparently high gutters, bad eye sight, too much waffling and not enough attention caused them to go over.

This, if we had the correct award (the golden zimmer frame) would attract two nominees – PHANTOM and CAPTAIN – with no doubt more to come in the coming years.

 The circle was run, down downs given, bull shit abounded and on on to a very Sri Lankian chicken curry and rice – excellent fare.

A good run, excellent food.  

Well done SIR TOM ARSE and CHRISTMAS and of course MRS ERNIE DINGO for delicious food.

Mr Scumbag.

2416 BAREFOOT and XMAS and others try to be Unique

Barefoot,s Run 2416 An effort to ccver Virgin Territory

 

The run started from a great location in exelent conditions for a run.

The route was a good one taking us through Betty,s Jetty and over the new bridge (a first for most of us) Interestly Ramrods dog normally has a crap five minutes into a run, but for some reason this time the dog crapped near the bucket before the run started otherwise it would have left a huge pile right in the middle of the jetty causing all sorts of problems for Collin Barnets re-election chances.

After leaving the jetty we headed up into the City, by this time the pack was a bit spread out due to the lack of arrows and false trails, having said that perhaps we missed a few markers due to the many distractions on the way which was mostly fit young women in Lycra Action Wear jogging home from their work in the city.

During the run through the city a wee man in a yellow high viz vest ( Who looked a bit like Deeply Boring) kept jumping out shouting directions at us, most ignored him and those who didn't ended up lost or late home.

The run itself was a bit dijointed as the arrows were hard to find after the Bus station and pack spread far and wide

We eventually ended-up back at the bucket bang on the hour to a meal that Hashers love best, and that's one that you can eat with one hand leaving the other free to hold a beer.

All in all a very enjoyable run,

Well done Barefoot.    by RIMMER