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Run 2636 – Scumbag @ Hamer Park

A GLORIOUS EVENING IN MOUNT LAWLEY

A large pack convened at Hamer Park in spite of the instructions and lack of a sign until 5:50 when the pack had assembled.  Folks looking for North from the South were disappointed as it is called Longroyd from Lawley Street.

The horn was blown to get the attendance list done and the pack away and the Hare from Lala land was elsewhere on the planet.  A belligerent arrival and a brisk on-on had us away through the burbs, not crossing Walcott or into ECU, A good start.  Arrows, checks and FTs plentiful.  We use Ps at HHH but not Scummy; he uses arrows.   There were enough of them.

We crossed Alexander Drive, used laneways rather well and came up through the back of Angove. This was good running territory.

Thereafter we crossed back over Fitzgerald and now the smallish pack disintegrated.  At this stage, there were seven of us left. We got across Walcott together and remained on trail until we are asked to turn right at Queens when on Clifton Street. By then Gumby had called enough and Bushy and Moses, thought the extra loop to the East a luxury,

The four who decided to go on must have lost trail and added a stack as Gnocchi had 9.4km and Moses only 7, with Q somewhere in between.

All said a pretty good run; the hamburgers were really terrific after a long spell of Covid suited food and this author would say something over 8 was an appropriate score.

Well done Scummy and Antman.

(Written by Moses).

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50th Anniversary Parliament House run photos

The Premier of Western Australia, Mark McGowan MLA, speaks to the hash chapters of Perth on the steps of Parliament House.

Mark McGowan MLA, on the steps of Parliament House addressing the gathered hashers (from the many chapters in greater Perth area). The Premier spoke about the benefits of running hash and commented that he has known Eric Ripper, former leader of the Labor Party, known to us as ‘Sir Knob’ for over 25 years. He went on to say he has never seen Eric looking better so Hash must be benefitting him.

The Premier then called ‘On on that way’ and depending where you where standing it was either to the left or to the right, showing that Hash is apolitical.

The Premier of Western Australia, Mark McGowan MLA, addresses the Hash on the steps of Parliament House.
GM greets Premier of WA
Perth Hash 2020 GM, Max ‘Horse’ Hore, meets and greets the Premier of Western Australia.
Is that chalk for marking the run asked the Premier?
Polly, On Sec of Perth Hash, gets to talk next.
Hmmm…which way does the run go, ‘to the left’?
Wagon & Cans.
Hamersley Hash have a photo opportunity with the Premier.
The Premier asks Sir Knob about the benefits of joining Perth Hash.
The signing of the Perth Hash T-Shirts.
Hashers of Perth.
What time does the run start?
Last opportunity to view the Perth Hash ‘Beer Bus’.
Great food was (self) served.
It wouldn’t be a joint run without Hamersley Hash! And South of Perth Hash House Harriers.
Sir Knob, RA of Perth Hash, addressing the hashers.
Our Chief Tugger, Rumpole, enjoying a small drink.
Meanwhile whilst the runners where hitting the streets the GM and On Sec (and St Peter, a founding member along with Cans who both ran on run #1 on 16/02/1970) were posing with the Premier of Western Australia, Mark McGowan MLA.

We understand ‘Sarge’ from the Perth Harriettes convinced the Premier to don the 50th Anniversary Perth Hash House Harriers T-Shirt for the photo opportunity.

Run 2641 – Sir Knob and Phantom @ Subi Oval

The run/walk started off with great promise from the old Subi Oval ( where the mighty Dockers played ) CAR PARK ,WHY THEY NEED A CARPARK THAT SIZE BEATS ME.

We got to the heritage listed gates and the first f#@$%^k up, Phantom ,the cohere could’nt read the map properly Dick Tracy suggested turn it upside down ,that didn’t work and we finally made our way across the oval to Bob Hawke College,quite apt I thought ,considering our hare was an EX

Labor polly.We continued on past Perth Modern were ,lo and behold, our cohare went to school .I really think they should change their logo ,something about exceptional students didn’t ring with me

From there we meandered thru Mueller Park and past Subi School of Dance .

The run/walk then meandered thru to Harold Boas Gardens  ,where many a wedding has been held and some divorces, from there I’ve got no idea as I SHORT CUT BACK TO THE BUCKET.

It was good to see my OLD mate Stumbles there, still looking robust as ever, and welcome back Conman from his hip operation, AND last but not least Antman’s son Junior Antman.

Now about the on on, we got the details of Barefoot’s funeral and wake ,may I SAAY A TRUE HASH LEGEND ,still running up to the last!!!!! The food was curry cooked by ( supposedly ) the hare but there was one small problem ,why didn’t they use the disposable lates instead of the ones I had to wash.

IWBDFQ

Mumbles

Run 2640 – Emu and Gumby at Beaconsfield

We gathered at a familiar car park next to the Dick Lawrence Oval in Beaconsfield to be welcomed by an equally familiar biting south-westerly.

It was good to see our hash run accorded national respect with the market closing for our stockbroker’s run. If he couldn’t trade for the afternoon no one else could either. Who knew that Emu had such power in the ASX? I will have to pay more attention to his financial advice.

A very long run then wandered through the surrounding district. And if I could find the map that Phantom gave me at the end of the evening I could give you more detail.

Suffice to say that for the sheltered hashers living in more salubrious suburbs the run was a socio-economic education. I thought it was excellent territory where even your scribe might have secured a majority vote.

The circle began with a minutes silence to mark the sad passing of our friend and long-term hasher, Barefoot. His genial and wise contributions will be greatly missed.

Our one visitor, System 5 ½, a professional colleague and friend of Barefoot, addressed the circle in memory of his friend.

It is frequently the case that a major world religion cops a bucket at an event led by Emu. No not that one – on this occasion it was the Catholics and the Irish who were the subjects of the jokes. Members might have to be more respectful at our Christmas lunch at the Irish club.

Down downs were awarded to non-walkers, short cutting walkers and runners returning suspiciously early- some claiming to have run 7.5 km nevertheless.

The food was chicken and chips and various hashers could be seen scooping up stuffing and remnant chicken scraps with their fingers at the end of the evening. I will not name the hungry ones.

I have forgotten what score I awarded the run although it might have been 8.5. I have discovered that no one remembers or records my score anyway. Apparently the joint masters will make it up when we determine run of the year at our final committee meeting.

Late in the evening Birdman distinguished himself by phoning a member of the western suburbs car pool to request us to return and pick him up. This was an easy request to honour as we were parked right next to him. It might be wise for Birdman to be prepared for a down down on Monday.

Thanks Emu and Gumby for another great evening.

On on

Sir Knob

Run 2639 – Xmas at Carine

To say this run began disastrously would be an under-statement.

The weather was appalling with lots of rain and a very strong, cold wind. Shelter zero and not that far from the coast.

Bring back global warming!

The hare then announced, somewhat expectedly, that the trail had been washed out, there was no beer in the van and that there were no checks or falsies.

Shit! At this stage the run score was zip!

[NB: I am reliably informed there will be plenty of checks & falsies next week to make up]

However, as the 11 runners set off to the west, things improved.

I should point out that there were about 40 walkers, all rugged up as though they were about to embark on a 3 month expedition to Mawson.

Anyway, there was some trail, it didn’t rain much and the territory was quite good.

Under better conditions, it could have been an ok run.

We even ran down an aptly named “Christmas Lane” in the middle of a nature reserve.

But about here, the huge pack split in two and I can’t vouch for the 2nd half of the trail as several of us had to simply backtrack.

We then wisely relocated to Carine open space to luxuriate under shelter.

Then, what a surprise. As you would expect only from the gentleman’s hash, we were treated to 2 buckets – the new one graced us with its presence and lit up a 1km radius with this superb white light, so much so I thought I was at Optus stadium.

We had a good circle, a few tears for Trump and then  Christmas redeemed himself with some tasty hot pies.

Sir Knob, known for throwing other people’s money around, generously awarded a score of 8.1

Always encouraging to see how many turn up even on dreadful weather nights. Great commitment and that’s why we remain the premier hash!!

On On Emu

Run 2638 – Antman @ Whitfords Nodes

 itHash Run 3rd November 2020   Ant man and Scummy Run

Forget about the run write up, what about “The Bucket write up?” That’s where it was all happening.

I will however touch on the run.  Back at the Bucket  Phantom handed me his map and said it might help you do the write-up.  It looks like a bloody marathon.  I couldn’t see any of them with a sweat-up  or you are all ultra fit or short cutters  (I think the latter).  

I overheard Q say it could be around 12ks.?  The only one I reckon who did neither was Pitt.  Well done mate.  You showed em all up.  Although it does look well set out in particular the nodes.

Well done Antman and Scummy.  Bit of humour there at the start with Antman trying to catch his dog!

For the walkers,  very pleasant.  Pembo and I + hounds lost sight of the boys on Hilarys  Marina  after Horse directed us up a FT.  So Pem and me decided to walk across the bridge and through the Quay.  Pembo read a sign  as we proceeded (do’s and dont’s)  One was no dogs.  I noticed underneath it also said (except Guide dogs).  I  suggested to Pembo if stopped, we have two of the above which need to get used to large crowds.  (forget the blind bit,  Great chick magnets).

Back at the Bucket things were happening.  Back to Pitt.  Rumours were flying around!  He might have carket  it,  bitten by a snake,  fallen off a node,  skitled by a car or even  way “layed”  by one of the skinny dipper sheila’s  on the beach.?

At the same time, our esteemed member Sir Knob called up Moses (lost his dog dish again) for a Down Down.  We were informed he was not available as he had locked his keys in his car.  Even the great minds of our mob and mechanics  couldn’t get in,  so called in outside help.  After he arrived less than a minute job done.  Mosses stress levels abated  until he got the bill

Back to the bucket.  I managed  to get  a joke in the “Renta Crowed  showed ” their usual applause.  (Trumpy could use this lot?)

Then there was dinner.  Compliments to Antman’s Missus.  Stacks of rice, sprinkled with  bits  of chook and topped with a yummy salad.  Excellent fare.  Except no-one told Scummy you had to supply the cutlery,  Where was the Hash Flash when you need him?  Balancing rice on a knife-blade.  Lots using their hands, if your an Arab, which hand don'[t you use?  

Best one of the night Sir Knob trying to fit a Ladle into his mouth.  Mind you he was a “Polly”.

Once again it was a great nights Hashing,  now I’ve got to go home and do the bloody dishes!     On  On    Xmas       

Run 2631 – Dick Tracey @ Carine

Perth Hash House Harriers, Run 2631 14 September 2020

Hares, Dectective Senior Sargeant  (retd.) Dick Tracey, Budgie

On a warm spring evening almost forty athletes gathered at Carine Open Space for the eagerly anticipated Dick Tracey run.

Before the start I inteviewed the famous detective, who, displaying commendable modesty, said he would give it a score of 9.5.

The packs set off promptly at 18.00 hours, runners in one direction, walkers a few degrees to the side. Within two minutes of the start, Phantom took a tumble trying to jump over a safety rail onto some steps. He handed the map to first deputy navigator Stewie and went to the local clinic for first aid. The GP  persuaded Emu to drive him to hospital to get his hand stitched up. Ably guided by Stewie, the thirteen remaining walkers did a clockwise loop, staying entirely in the open space. Back in 44 minutes, having covered 3.8 km. Just perfect.

The runners were in soon after the walkers. The venerable Pitt scored it an 8, despite having to cross Reid Highway twice.   Q gave it 7.5 ( I think, I seem to have inadvertently deleted the voice memos on my iPhone).

The circle was no more shambolic than normal. Several downdowns were awarded, deserved or not.

Dick Tracey served excellent chicken burgers with a very good selection of salads. No pots or plates to be cleaned by next week’s hare!

ON ON, Birdman