Run 2678 – Phantom in Claremont


While thinking about how to summarise the run I stumbled on an underling theme which I am surprised Dickie being a bit of a clairvoyant had not picked up on ,however bearing in mind he did have trouble finding the venue being in the Western Suburbs so he was a little confused , the theme, considering the seniorority of the hares , the route took us past the Ghost Ride, The Covid Clinic the into Karrakatta Cemetery , scary stuff.

Getting back to the run a reasonable size pack met at a very good location plenty of light and cover , pack set off on a scenic tour of the Showgrounds, they became a little unsettled as hash hound Twitch did the mandatory poo amongst them, in their haste to vacate the area they disappeared up some well set false trails, then headed up past the Clinic before losing the tail for a short while outside the ground.Run. then took us through the Cemetery parts of Claremont before returning to the heart of THE MIGHTY FIGHTING TIGERS.

Have got little information regarding the performance of the runners as my contact FT failed dismally, however being a noted shortcutter , he would have little information regarding the run anyway. In hindsight a very poor choice.

The circle was very entertaining with Gumby in fine form, lots of laughs, mainly at Chunders expense ,in summary a very good run , excellent food, a good time was had by all.

To keep Phantom happy, I failed to mention the hares by name could you add at the bottom,” Well done Hares Phantom and Sir Knob”
On On

Run 2677 – Barcode in Kalamunda

BARCODE and Family The Kalamunda Hillbillies
It,s a long drive for the Chardonnet set from the Western Suburbs and was made longer by the fact that our regular passenger , BOTAK ,was not at the pick up spot .We phoned to find out that he lost track of time –a sign of Old Timers disease . to his credit he did turn up and join us at around 6:10 – [editor’s note! 5:10 may be the correct time?]
Anyway we arrived with 5 minutes to spare to the freezing climate of the hills . After a great loop of the Oval and environs the pack ,including Walkers ,arrived back on Canning Rd.The runners went one way and the Walkers short cut to the Shopping Centre where we followed various lanes ,arcades and false trails to Stirk Pk
At this point PEMBOs pooches thought a swim in the swamp was a good idea-not . Then Dickie and Colonel did a 360 on the slippery park and the Running Pack caught up with us .Over Kalamunda Rd and into the bush where we found evidence of PEMBO again -Arrows painted on ground – and the pack then took off downhill .We slower chaps headed for home arriving at 7PM whereas the runners showed up about 25 mins later.
A well set run with lots checks and good false trails (as expected )but probably a trifle long for our aging runners (except Q )
At the ONON we were graced with other locals like DAVE the POM and SEAGULL but the standout was the ageing Nat Fyfe look alike -ARISTOCAT Talk about trying to stay Young
Several Birthday cartons appeared -Wagon Guinness and Cans assorted Old English Ales -Hope didn’t miss anyone
Finally the food Very tasty triage of chicken /beans /curry and rice
A few more beers and back to civilisation –Glad I wasn’t driving home

Run 2676 – Skid in Palmyra

Skidding out on the Highway to Hell – Take 2
2020 saw the Highway to Hell Festival in Perth, tens of thousands of people lined Canning Highway for an event for the ages – would the 17th of August 2021 be the same? Well, there wasn’t quite thousands, but certainly 40 odd keen participants who gathered between the banks of our beautiful river and the curbs of the renowned Canning Highway.
After watching the typical back and forth and round and round of the bucket trying to park (I’ve seen semi-trailers fit into tighter spaces with less effort), and after a somewhat rowdy on on a group of a dozen or so runners headed off for the inevitable loop around Tompkins Park. Alas, this is where it started to come undone, half the pack, led by FT and Q, in an effort to short cut, tried to leap frog the more responsible runners (led by Barcode) but simply achieved the bypassing of a critical false trail. So while the Barcode team headed east along a loooooong and boring stretch of trail aside the river, FT and his mob decided to “go west young man” and do the run in reverse – I know those of the Gaulish decent are known for some level of oddity (driving on the wrong side of the road for a start) this really took the cake – or gâteau if you prefer.
Moving on…….when we did finally move away from the mighty Swan the trail took us somewhat predictably south up Wireless Hill where we passed FT, Q and Another Prick in the Wall heading in the wrong direction. When we finally did reach the summit however, despite searching for several minutes, the trail was lost to us. A vote was called and given the time, the clear consensus was to find the way down the hill and back to the bucket. Down the hill was not that simple though given Barcode decided to lead his dedicated followers down a goat track of sorts; but despite the incessant grumblings of Moses all made it safely to firmer ground, with even the evergreen Pitt making it through unscathed.
The circle issued its standard down downs for returnees, birthdays and anniversaries before the On Sec Ramrod delivered easily the joke of the decade to date, the hilarity was so immense Ramrod lost all composure only part way into the gag having to read lines between bouts of schoolgirl giggling. Sherlock took to the podium to once again highlight the casual and institutional racism which continues to permeate all levels of society. Polly’s rigged raffle was held and Stewie astonishingly not only had the winning ticket, but also drew the Joker!! Looking forward to a father son lunch at the pub Stewie, obviously your shout.
Nanny then did what Nanny does best, shout non-sensical stuff at people and incite roars of derision. He attempted to back up Ramrod’s excellent oratory with a joke of his own, how did it go? – FLAT – AS – A – PANCAKE. The hares were eventually called up and issued a near perfect score by the RA, astounding given half the runners lost the trail somewhere near the mid-point and the other half did the run backwards. The peaceful and affluent residents of Alfred Cove were then witness to a proud rendition of “We go hashing on a Monday…..” before the pack was treated to an excellent serving of hot, individually wrapped fish and chips.
Well done Skid and Grizzly, perfect weather, solid run and excellent fare. On on. Barcode

Run 2675 – Jack Russell in East Perth

This run had all the signs of a disaster with a storm front passing through although a surprising 33 turned up despite the weather. Would have been 34 but Bushie got lost on the way!!! No shelter, no light and no parking (as the Eagles match at Optus stadium had been moved to 6:10pm and the area was awash with cars). However who said Hashmen can’t get a quart into a pint pot! With some excellent marshalling all the cars were squeezed in one way or another. The van provided light and limited shelter was provided by an gazebo tied to a fence after it had blown away once.
The pack gathered in the dark with the runners set off in one direction and the walkers led by Phantom in the opposite. We went along the river and around Claisebrook and back in record time as Phantom seemed to worry about getting wet. Very pretty lighting effects to entertain the troops. Back at the bucket after about 35-40 minutes we found the runners who had lost the trail in the dark and wet. See the attached map below to find where you should have gone.
Everyone got stuck into the ration amidst complaints of “no dark stout”. This was because of the large amount of other beer returned from a fortnight ago. Have no fear there will be some next week. After the circle and food (plenty of excellent pizzas) the heavens opened with the rain trying to fall horizontally. The pack brought a new meaning to social distancing huddled under the gazebo in the space not taken up by a table and resembled a group of penguins in perpetual motion- those on the weather side constantly trying to move to the centre or the lee. Once that stopped we packed up and moved out (again expertly extracting the vehicles) before the spectators at Optus came back to their cars. We didn’t know that they were prevented from leaving because of the threat of lightning.
It was a great night despite the conditions. Well done Jack Russell and Moses you turned a disaster into a success under very difficult circumstances.. On On. by Ramrod (only because Skid is too slack to provide a write-up)

Run 2674 – Hamersley 2222 Joint Run in Karrinyup

Run 2674 – Hamersley 2222 run at Millington Reserve, Karrinyup.

19 PH3 members along with West Coast and Bullsbrook joined Hamersley for their run. After some confusing instructions the runners set off goodness knows where and the walkers went off down Elliot Road past St Mary’s Anglican Girls School and under Marmion Avenue down to cross West Coast Highway. Turning south walking until we came to the underpass which led us to Bounemouth Parade then to a walkway that took us back to Peet Crescent and another path that took us back to the other end of Elliot Road and followed back to home. A lot of the time we were on trail but didn’t see the runners till near the end.
The venue was under shelter at the Scarborough Football Club Rooms which was just as well as it was very cold and the scanty serving wenches kept warm by fast service of liquid refreshments. Large amounts of cheese, ham, corn chips, humus, and excellent chillis greeted us before the circle. This was typical Hamersley with lots of charges and long jokes. The ice seat was well used including by Nanny. Horse and Ramrod also had down downs but no ice thank goodness. Later sitizens had it hot and cold with a wench on each knee. Missed out there Nanny. The evening must have heated up as the girls had to dispense with half their clothing. Eventually the food was served in individual containers – an excellent chilli and rice. I thought it a top night and well worth the money.