Run 2621 – FT’s Cockman House Run

Was this FT’s Cockman House run or FT’s Cock-up run?

FT, always a forward planner, had planned this run site for a summer run. Well COVID-19 put paid to that. However, FT was up to the challenge, he provided shelter where there was no shelter, lights where there were no lights, no rain where there was rain and parking ….err the parking was fine.

The hashers assembled ready for the French challenge, sans the blue, white and red flag. We set off south down Cockman House Road towards Woodvale Drive, with no FT to lead the charge.

After a couple of FT’s (False Trails not French Ticklers) we headed towards Wanneroo Road. Moses handed the map to Bushie who conferred with Mastitis, but Mastitis claimed he didn’t’ have his ‘eyes’ so was as much help with finding trail as WHO is in managing COVID-19. Now I can empathise with Phantom, trying to ‘keep in contact with a map’ which has and many roads labelled as some hashers have set runs (that’s not many for those not familiar with my dry sense of humour) and is covered in shiny plastic which reflects a powerful torch beam back in ones eyes is difficult to say the least.

More of that later…we run back and forth in a southerly direction to eventually cross Wanneroo Road near Wild West Hyundai and Wangara Honda.  There are more car yards in Wangara than Parramatta Road! The run went up the hill towards PLE Computers as most hashers were trying to get back to Wanneroo Road. The real runners crossed Ocean Reef Road and headed north. But not far enough north apparently.

The pack fragmented into small groups as all were looking to head for the bucket. Reluctant remarked that Bushie should have been a politician as he confidently predicted ‘this is the way’ only to find it was a dead end. There were eight-foot-high fences to stop us entering the US style clover leaf intersection of Ocean Reef Road and Wanneroo Road (none of which were present on the FT provided MAP!).

Grizzly was complaining of sore knees and was looking for the quickest way back to the bucket – so were the rest of us.

Mastitis & Bushie found a way across the Los Angeles style roadway and sprinted (well ran) back to the bucket. Grizzly eventually turned up.

With the hashers now kitted out in their new Haby, curtesy of Crayfish and Bushie, the circle got under way. Polly told a joke that had been carefully handed down from his grandfather to his father and then onto Polly. There were down-downs for Entry Re-Entry from Bali2 and returnee Wagon. Wagon put on a carton of Guinness Extra Stout making the most of the ‘pay $50 for your birthday carton and get up to $90 worth of beer’ supplied by Perth Hash (go figure the math’s on that one & the effect on Perth Hash House Harriers Inc. bottom line!). Then it was over to our RA, Sir Knob, who told a ‘ripper’ of a joke about a lady who had a facelift. It eventually included an ex Liberal Cabinet Minister due to one of the hecklers suggestions that the said ex Liberal Cabinet Minister was the lady in the story.

Sir Knob was not complimentary about the area we ran though. Not up to Claremont standards let alone Cottesloe standards.

The circle concluded with the second rendition of ‘We Go Hashing Every Monday’ due to The Nanny singing the first one before the allocated time slot.

Food was very tasty. It was Subway sandwich with choices of chicken, ham and (roast) beef.

Sir Knob awarded the run 7.8 or there-about.

Grizzly was busy following Rumpole’s 14 page packing up the bucket instructions when your scribe left for home.

On On Bushie