Run 2531 Reluctant with Phantom and Sir Knob

Reluctant strategically asked Phantom and Sir Knob to be his co-hares so that he could blame them had the run been a dud.  He didn't need to worry as the run was well designed going down to the river, then north through UWA and then South through Nedlands.  Emu scored it a nine but probably would have given it a ten if Sir Knob had been a Liberal.
Cheese, bickies, sausage and a welcome fire pit greeted the runners on their return.  The food, delivered by a couple of girls, was a very tasty hot, spicy stew. 
Returnees including Fags, Mark1, Yaapi, Polecat, Crayfish & Rumpole.

On On 

Run 2532 Fags and Cans @ Morris Buzacott Reserve

The scribe was late for the run only to find Fags alone at the bucket with Mark 1 assisting??  Mrs Fags (Pat) was also there keeping the hash nosh warm. Cans had apparently assisted in setting the run but was not there to get any of the credit or blame!


We have previously run in Kardinya but not from this site so here is some information:-

Morris Buzacott Reserve is a sporting space in Kardinya suitable for picnics, medium sized gatherings, family reunions and children’s birthday parties. (And apparently Hash runs!) I couldn’t find any information on who Morris Buzacott was but Google did tell me that a

Hash Run was scheduled there for August 6 involving Hares Fags and Captain!!


The run started with a loop around the Community Centre to a check on Prescott Dr. Then it went along Cassidy, Burdett and Donavon streets and across Somerville Bvd into Chingthrop. A few falsies and checks later and it headed towards Piney Lakes Reserve. Then looping around towards Winthrop Drive around Winthrop Park and back over Somerville into Kardinya and Home.


The front runners arrived at the Bucket around 7pm closely followed by the walkers and the rest of the peloton. About 15 minutes later Haggis, Triplej, Antman and a few others made it back only to be told they had missed the chips. Triplej explained that “any good Scott will never turn his torch on as it uses up the battery and this was why they had lost the trail.” I’m still scratching by head! The Run was scored 9/10!


I had a phone call from one of my golf mates “Stormin” Norman Burd who was standing nearby wondering if this was one of the strange Hash Runs I had talked about. As he was a Burd I introduced him to Birdman. 


The Circle was eventful with various references to the Hash Lunch, very nice Japanese I am told and Stumbles had a complaint for The Mole. Something about coming all the way up from Mandurah and being the only person there? Various down downs awarded for dogs having pyjamas on Antman and Moses. Mumbles for something nobody understood. The entire bunch of Eagles supporters for a weekend in which a huge Gaff was made and for their hierarchy who are a complete embarrassment.


Food was an excellent chicken curry and the pots were not too hard to clean. Thank you Fags!!


On On



Run 2528 – Birdman and Barefoot

It was a great run set up by Birdman and co-hare Barefoot.

The only major criticism is maybe they should not trust meteorologists (especially those in hash) to give you weather forecasts … there was no need for wellington boots.

It was a nice 7.7km run through an area with various stops to admire the impressive houses (mansions and castles).

A warm ham and pea soup was perfect for a nice cold night.

Speial mention to Sir Knob for contributing a whisky for the raffle, to Jerrycan for the insight into Ned Kelly (may he rest in peace), to the committee for allowing Xmas to say a joke (and this time, it was actually pretty good and short), to Dick Tracey for ensuring Bushy never looses his keys again, to Emu for the nice picture of the Croatian president lookalike and to the neighbour dancing along on Birdman's back patio (refer to Shirlock's video at around the 3min 14sec mark).

Thank you Birdman.


Perth #. On On.

(Editor's note from Sir Knob: I think the whisky was donated by Antman)

Run 2530 Dollar Rises Again

We turned up to same same as last time   -It was raining and bleak –Usual for a Monday lately ,except for BIRDMAN”S effort earlier in month .

We took off in the rain with Hare’s instructions to walkers to go thru tunnel  . A small panic as we could not see chalk in dry tunnel . Local knowledge from the Supremo short cutter MOLE , soon had us on trail .

The runners had obviously had some initial difficulty in finding trail in the rain as when they had not caught up at 6:30 the courageous walking group reached the local shopping centre and headed home .Realising we were well ahead ACTION and Google  lead us past home and we came in via the back passage –always pretty exciting !!

According to ANOTHER PRICK In the WALL the  runners had totally lost trail and dribbled in about 7 pm and all quickly headed for shelter for a dry drink .

SIRTOMARSE delivered the worst joke I have heard since Primary School and SCUMMY rabbited on forever about some Harriet function Who Bloody cares ,except BIRDY if the circle lasts more than  7.5 minutes.

EMU then chastised (correctly ) the previous weeks hares for no signage  (left    ‘em home ) and appealed to future Hares to help JMs by finding replacement when unable to perform (a few of us are familiar with that problem )

We then heard about COLONEL’s dick amputation (that WAS funny ) and enoyed DOLLAR’s tasty beef stew .

Well done DOLLAR and FT but there is no reason why you can’t set this run again in 18 months as no-one has fully completed your run yet


Run No. 2529 Hares – Goliath & Sir Tom


Location South of the River – Never Good! No signs for guidance some of us had to do the scenic tour.

Weather was windy and light rain.

The sporting complex veranda protected us from the weather we were able to locate the trailer there also.

Numbers were down 30+ mostly due to the weather and the distance South of Perth.

What time is a 6:00pm start? 6:10pm apparently!

The Hares marked the trail late due to the weather both arrived back covered in lime powder. The use of lime worked well considering the weather.

The run / walk started at 6:10pm the only piker was the Mole who stayed beside the fire,  “too wet, too cold” he said.

The walk went for an hour and 10 minutes, crossed the trail with the runners from time to time. The run was well marked new country through bush tracks, roads and creeks which Boner tried to cool down by taking a swim!

From all accounts the run was a good run. No complaints only Boner. The on on was a bit confusing with a false trail and some distance from home.

The walkers and runners returned to the trailer about the same time 7:20pm approximately.

The usual get together before the circle everything seemed ok until no chips. What? No chips?!

The night was saved by Dick Tracey and his birthday chocolates!

The circle started with visitors, returnees and birthdays down downs with the odd songs from Gumby!

Then Budgie interjection seemed to take over the circle.

Apparently emu got lost finding his way to the run and went home! Emu’s fill in was Budgie  who by then was in full flight.

Thank God he was only on for a short time.

The run received a 7 out of 10.

Foods on! Curried Sausages and Corned Bread – Very Very Nice and plenty of it!

A good night was had by all!

Thanks Goliath and Sir Tom


Run 2524 Nanny and Co-hare Jack Russell @ Gwelup Swamp

Run 2524 Nanny and Co-hare Jack Russell @ Gwelup Swamp

Whilst the REAL hares and a modicum of walkers followed the trail one
notable idle member stayed behind ostensibly to guard the grog–he did a
good job.
About 40 runners turned out for a short run which had the early returnees
completing the course in 70 minutes. As this scribe did not venture on to
the course he is not qualified to comment on it. However, notable that venue
(start and finish with good lighting, cover-no rain and a dry pack). Mumbles
again took a tumble (Note the poetic phrase,) and managed to clean out the
first aid kit whilst tending his wounds ( just a few superficial grazes on
the BACK of his hands-work that out!!)
So into the tucker—pseudo Italian. Well it had pasta,and the pack cleaned
it out, so the majority enjoyed it. BUT Nigela Lawson was not there-pity.
Next week's snack will be cassoulet . Yes,I know that you have had it
before,but how many knew how to spell it-cassoulet that is.
Scribe 2524
Alias Mk1

Run 2522 – Shakin’ at Maylands Golf Course

Our first really chilly night running this year and fortuitously Shakin organized the rain to hold off.

Plenty of car parking and lights that worked opposite Maylands golf club.

Shakin, ably assisted by Polecat and a youthful Mitch from the relative pool, set a pretty good run. Well marked, adequate checks and falsies.

We began in the newer section of the suburb and wended our way anti-clockwise towards Guildford road at which point, the pack split at the recreation centre, never to be rejoined.

Triple and Scummy, being visionally challenged,  found it quite difficult as they were both saving the batteries in their torches.

There were 3 or 4 very long stretches which is the dilemma faced when setting runs in older suburbs.

Good length if you did the full run 60-70 minutes

Back at the bucket, a good circle, good tucker and even the luxury of a fire in Shakin’s designer bbq.

Thanks for your effort  Shakin.

Run 2518 – Triple J @ MacDonald Park, Padbury

Run 2518 – Triple J @ MacDonald Park, Padbury

The run started from Macdonald Park in Padbury. A location the we have been many times before. Off we headed at 6pm where we were greeted with our first false trail……..  and this is where everything turned to shit. We finally found some P’s after running around in circles for 10 minutes. The run headed out towards whitfords ave, this was as far a I got. We couldn’t ( we being FT and I ) find trail from there, so we had a nice run back down whitfords ave, running past Tripple J’s house where we could smell the Bunnings Sausages being cooked up! And back on home down marmion ave.

Arriving back at the bucket, I heard some rumours of Tripple J going to win the Dunny seat award this year, but lets not get too carried away.

I personally covered 8.3kms, so if I was to find the chalk and complete the whole run, I would imagine it would have been around the 12km mark! The poor walkers were out there for 1 hour and 15 mins! Poor blokes!

Q and 3G turned 18, Rumpole, Gumbi and Botak  had birthdays aswell, although a lot older than 18. We had 1 visitor – Putrid, and Gumbi and Christmas were our returnees. Gnocchi (me) was called up for my second 10 year anniversary Mug.

Emu got Tripple J up to talk about the run, which apparently took him 2 hours to set. Tripple J was disappointed we didn’t get to see the topless lady he had organised behind the Craigie leasure centre! But apparently his next 50 run starts will be from the same location until he gets it right.

His score was 4 for the run, plus 1 for the light and plus 1 for the girl walking her dog on the run! So that gave him a grand total of 6 /10.

We were served with Gourmet Bunnings sausages which have left me 5 times over. Oh, and horse was upset there were no greens!

Good job Tripple J!!



Run 2517 – Anzac Joint Run hosted by Bullsbrook at Garvey Park

Run 2517 – Anzac Joint Run hosted by Bullsbrook at Garvey Park, with Perth, Hamersley, Fremantle, West Coast and assorted others.

Hashmen of Perth amassed with all their assorted buckets at Garvey Park for this Anzac Run hosted by Bullsbrook. The weather was cool but still, so ideal conditions, another perfect night for Hashing.

Proceedings commenced just before 6:15 with some traditional Anzac words to commemorate those who have made the ultimate sacrifice for their country, with many Hashmen wearing their best Anzac t-shirts, various military regalia and a few medals in the mob.

The pack of over 100 runners and walkers set off at a good pace through Garvey Park along the River, then the runners took a couple of right-handers onto Great Eastern Highway back towards the airport. From this point I have no idea where the walkers went. The runners quickly spread out along the long straight runs, as the global chalk shortage became apparent, with the total number of checks and false trails countable on one hand. The pack found enough arrows to be taken on a tour of the airport extremities along Fauntleroy Avenue, Dunreath Drive and the now-blocked-off Brearley Drive. The front runners were cracking along at quite pace as we crossed Great Eastern Highway again, where I deliberately slowed down to allow young BONER to catch up to give him some confidence in his upcoming double-stage of the Margaret River Ultra Marathon in s couple of weeks time.

We swung back into Garvey Park and finished on the out trail after a short, sharp 5.5km run, where we were welcomed with cheese and crackers to accompany the Splash, courtesy of the wonderful Hound Dog committee. Miraculously, the walkers appeared from a different direction, but arrived safe and sound without losing anyone, not even Phantom.

The circle was led by some interesting Bullsbrook characters, where charges were heard. BONER was made to sit on ice "probably" for talking in the circle. Our very own Hash Flash SHERLOCK upset proceedings when he was charged having a bigger one than the Bullsbrook Hash Flash (I’m taking about photographic appendage around his neck). When he was instructed to sit on ice for this crime he stood in the circle, raised his middle finger as a sign of his respect of the authority therein, and told them all to “Get fucked”. This prompted much jeering amongst the pack, whereby one of RUMPOLE's Hamersley mates offered to sit on the ice on SHERLOCK's behalf. TAMPAX, a Bullsbrook hare, was given a down-down for losing his car keys while setting the run, which were never found and resulted in the RAC towing him, and his car, home. BUDGIE was called up for his antisocial parking of the bucket, and his Perth mates offered to transfer him to Hamersley, but this generous offer was refused. So we've still got him.

Some raucous singing of Hash Club songs finished the circle, including a solo performance by the only member of Fremantle Hash to be present. After which Perth Hashmen chowed down on some delicious pasta which your GM ACTION had cooked up earlier in the day. It was so good that leftovers were taken by Antman and Horse for their dogs/chooks or maybe for breakfast the next morning. But it was a good crowd, good weather, runners ran and walkers walked. What more could you want from a night of Hashing?

Well, maybe a bit more chalk . . .

Run 2516 ANTMAN at Joondalup Arena

I was looking forward to this run after weeks of listening to Antman bang on about how good it was going to be, we have had to endure every detail as we car pool to Hash every week, mind you it makes a change to listening to him and the Mole chat incessantly about trains or train sets (yes toy trains)and yes I know they are grown men. I actually prefer trainset chatter over Antmans description of one of his thousands of beer bottle labels as I usually fall asleep then wake up at the ONON with a stiff neck.
So to the run, my night started with an unexpected passenger in mister Tracy’s car, Budgie was sitting in the front seat (where I usually sit) I wasn’t told why he was there I am assuming his normal lift has got fed up listening to him and hand balled him to us.
We then picked up the Mole and we were on our way, not to far tho as the discussion turned to which way to go, so after some excellent instructions from the Mole we were off, I did notice the mole didn’t hear mister Tracy say he knew the way as he was a West Perth supporter and went to Arena Joondalup every other week, the Mole is helpful like that always telling people where to go I don’t understand why some people find it annoying.
Budgie kept us entertained with tales of the bucket, wow what a great job the tuggers do and what fun they have doing it, it seems like a lot of fun driving all over the country side with The dog and the colonel, and at the end of the night they get to pack all the gear away count all the bottles budgie said it has something to do with keeping Alzheimer’s at bay by keeping the mind active, they even have a bloody song something about green bottles and a wall sounds like they have a laugh.
Before we knew it we were in Joondalup and the Mole and Dick were trying to decide where to park, it’s almost like they are married.
So we run out of the car park to a false trail at the back of the Arena, sadly it one of the few falsies we would see. It was very thoughtful of the hares to have us run around the Arena amongst all the young fit bodies playing soccer and rugby just a gentle reminder to us of our former selves.
It’s hard to say where we ran as sadly most of Joondalup looks the same, for me I crossed the main road through the city centre then got myself involved in a conversation with Birdman about birds of all things, then I found myself with a tough decision do I stay with the walkers or do I go down the footpath into the darkness with the pack getting farther away, I go after the pack and end up in the middle of a field with my torch running low on batteries I headed for the light found the main road again followed the out trail back to the bucket where a nice cold beer was waiting, thanks again to the tugger.
The pack arrived home to a sigh of relief from the hares, then the walkers made it back and another Perth Hash run was completed.
The circle was called and Horse jumps on the box and we are off, visitors were called up and given a drink, Horse told the story of his son Brumby being born on the day Emu ran his first Hash run or maybe the other way around, Elbows was given a down down for another imaginary sexual experience, Stewie was thanked for his efforts raising money for the 50th birthday celebration, well done Stewie.
The RA moved onto the box and we waited to see which way he would go would he be PC or non PC, I think the latter as he can’t help himself, we were shown a photo of someone’s wife wearing a burka and I’m sure I have seen her before I would need to have a closer look but I’m sure I’ve seen her face before, we needed to get going as the food was ready and the hares were pissed, Batak was called up and retrospectively given a down down for last weeks run not having enough false trails and to much Pizza, or was it the other way around.
The hares were called Antman and Scumbag what a combination, there was a bit of banter about the lack of false trails and parts of the run being to long, for me it was just the right length even if I only did half.
The food was Antmans creation from Brazil and with the assistance of Scumbag it was dished out and there was plenty for everyone, my opinion it was very good and very hot. All good as far as I’m concerned.

Well done to the Hares and good on you Antman for trying out some new territory 10 out of 10 for me.

All in all a good nights Hashing was had and my thoughts turned to the journey home and how it would go with the mix of personalities, I soon found out as we got in the car mister Tracy turned to the Mole and said Mole I know the fucking way home so sit down and shut up.
Thank you for reading this and remember those of you who think this is a load of shit, it probably is.


Triple J